Category Scandals


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USA And Russia Prepare For Cold War 2: Electric Booglaoo

Boy, do we humans love a parade. Nothing gets us motivated and going like watching people walk as large groups. Holy crap, is that stupid when you really think about it.

They say a sequel can never be as good as the original, but there have been a few exceptions like Terminator 2, Aliens and of course World War 2. Well, the United States and Russia are preparing for a joint…


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WikiLeaks Clinton Docs Less Likely To Release By November Than “Half-Life 3”

Some valves leak information. Others produce video games. The only ones delivering lately just leak water.

There are a few different ways to disappoint the internet. One of them is not having the latest nude shots of their favorite celebrities readily available. Another is to promise the delivery of something and then postpone it. Yet another…


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Libertarians Are Forgetting Who Gary Johnson Is

Just like most Libertarians, the porcupine they chose as their logo is prickly and generally prefers to stay alone.

As it holds true for their leadership, it is not surprising to find out that Libertarians, just like Gary Johnson, can’t remember fairly important things. First Gary Johnson didn’t know or remember what Aleppo is and now he can’t remember…


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Donald Trump To Be Most Expensive Jobber In WWE History

This election has us all in a submission move.

While Donald Trump has neglected to release his tax returns, our investigative unit has been leaving no stone unturned in order to procure some data to put together to really try to hash out the mess that is his finances.…


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Prisoners Are On Strike, But You Don’t Care Because They’re Prisoners

And the flag was still there, because it had no possibility of parole.

In a surprising effort that shows that somehow prisoners have better communication with each other in different states than you did in your last, failed relationship, some 25,000 prisoners in about 29 prisons over 12 states have basically unionized. That’s…


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Investigations Into Scott Walker’s “Dark Money” Show Racial Bias In Terminology

Who needs deplorables when you can have baskets of money as a politician?

Not everyone has heard of Scott Walker and his campaign scheme, so let’s break it down really quickly for you. Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker’s 2012 recall election campaign was a dirty money funnel that had millions of dollars syphoned into…


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Dumpster Blown Up After Being Mistaken For Donald Trump

That's a lot of garbage in one place, and this time it isn't the RNC.

The Chelsea area of New York city was rocked by a large explosion last night, injuring nearly 30 people and putting thousands in a rush to find a safe way home. As streets were crowded, busses stalled and subways stopped,…


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Researchers Question Trump’s Support of Professional Women, Besides Prostitutes

Oh, those lovely ladies of ill repute. The things they can do for a dollar, and the things they certainly won't do for just a dollar.

In a conversation with Cosmopolitan, Ivanka Trump stated, “My father obviously has a track record of decades of employing women at every level of his company, and supporting women, and supporting them in their professional capacity, and enabling them to…


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Sen. Ted Cruz Opposes ICANN In Order To Erase Zodiac Killer References

Who are these shady internet characters? Is it ICANN or the Zodiac Killers?

Senator Ted Cruz is doing something none of us expecting: he’s championing the ideas of a free and uncensored internet. He’s trying to keep the internet from falling under the full control of ICANN as the government wants to keep…


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USA To North Korea: “Our D*ck Is Bigger!”

Well, it couldn't get more clear than this. It's become a d*ck waving contest.

After North Korea showed off that it has been conducting nuclear weapons tests, the united states decided it was time to give a show of force by basically sending two large, flying penises over their waters, letting them know just…