Scandals
Donald Trump Mistakenly Tweets Nuclear Arming Code “Covfefe”
Everyday, President Donald Trump manages to surprise us with a new social networking low, whether it be cursing out a celebrity, complaining about the news or posting photos of...
ISIS Claims Responsibility For Trump And Other Tragedies
The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) also known as the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS), or the Islamic State (IS), and by its Arabic...
US Launches 59 Missiles Loaded With Pepsi At Syria
While most people associate Mountain Dew to be the beverage of extremism, the USA has launched an attack on a Syrian air base using 59 Tomahawk missiles loaded to...
A Bunch Of Dicks Vote To Make Life Harder For Vaginas
While the gaggle of overall dicks that makes up the Senate were split 50/50 on a bill set to make the existence of Planned Parenthood a thing of the...
Paul Ryan Vows To Destroy The Healthcare System
So… sometimes you sit down to write something and then you just give up and decide not to write anything at all because… well, this happened:
Donald Trump To Lower Taxes By Letting Everyone Die
In an surprising move towards some legitimate transparency, The White House has released some information about the next changes to healthcare and regulations in the country which are designed...
5 Things We’re Surprised We Didn’t Find In Mike Pence’s E-Mails
As you may have heard, Mike Pence was using a private e-mail address for work and was phished out of his information in some ridiculous scheme reminiscent of the...
Donald Trump Won’t Go To The White House Correspondents’ Dinner Because He’s A Punk-Ass Bitch
One might remember that now-President Donald Trump was once verbally sterilized by Seth Meyers and President Barack Obama back in 2011 at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner. The thin-skinned,...
Hedorah The Smog Monster Confirmed To Head EPA
The Senate confirmed Hedorah, The Smog Monster on Friday to run the Environmental Protection Agency, putting a seasoned opponent of nature, cleanliness and renewable resources at the helm of President...
Kellyanne Conway Confirmed To Be From Alternate Universe Constantly Stuck In Opposite Day
Kellyanne Conway has said a lot of questionable things, including flat out lies and made up events she calls “alternative facts,” but what if they really are all true?...