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Researchers Question Trump’s Support of Professional Women, Besides Prostitutes

Oh, those lovely ladies of ill repute. The things they can do for a dollar, and the things they certainly won't do for just a dollar.

In a conversation with Cosmopolitan, Ivanka Trump stated, “My father obviously has a track record of decades of employing women at every level of his company, and supporting women, and supporting them in their professional capacity, and enabling them to…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 17, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Scandals, Science, World News

Sen. Ted Cruz Opposes ICANN In Order To Erase Zodiac Killer References

Who are these shady internet characters? Is it ICANN or the Zodiac Killers?

Senator Ted Cruz is doing something none of us expecting: he’s championing the ideas of a free and uncensored internet. He’s trying to keep the internet from falling under the full control of ICANN as the government wants to keep…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 16, 2016
  • Scandals, World News

USA To North Korea: “Our D*ck Is Bigger!”

Well, it couldn't get more clear than this. It's become a d*ck waving contest.

After North Korea showed off that it has been conducting nuclear weapons tests, the united states decided it was time to give a show of force by basically sending two large, flying penises over their waters, letting them know just…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 15, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Election

Edible Arrangements To Offer Basket Of Deplorables This Thanksgiving

Well, will you look at that spread! I bet you'd never say those words at a Trump rally!

Edible Arrangements, the company that has been making men and women the envy of their entire workplace for 17 years, is now ready to announce their newest item, the “Basket of Deplorables.” Inspired by the current political landscape, this delicious…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 14, 2016
  • Election, Scandals

Mike Pence To Say More Shocking Things Just To Get Noticed

Contrary to popular belief, the White House was not destroyed by alien invaders.

We’ve already told you that no one really knows who Mike Pence is and that his haircut gets more press than he does, and now it seems as though he has also taken notice. Trying to steal headlines, remain relevant and shock…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 13, 2016
  • Election, Scandals, Science

Hillary Clinton Hit With Zombie Plague But Is “Feeling Better”

Does she want your spare change or to bite off your shins? It's hard to tell these days.

As the DNC scrambles to figure out what to do in this very terse situation, camp Clinton has already released a press release to ease people’s minds and curb voter drop off. After paying her respects at the 9/11 Memorial,…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 12, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Religion, World News

Nation Remembers 15 Years Of Hating The Wrong People

This tiny American flag is all that is left of the instant patriotism that was gained 15 years ago.

Fifteen years ago, one of the most heinous, reviled and unforgettable acts of atrocity took place on September 11th. The soundtrack to Mariah Carey’s movie “Glitter” had hit the shelves. Then the unthinkable happened, as the World Trade Center in New…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 11, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Religion, Science, World News

iPhone 7 Specs Cause Largest Strike In World History

The world's most talked about masturbatory aid.

The largest strike in the history of our human lives has taken place this week in India and you probably hadn’t heard about it. On September 2nd, 2016, a trade union coalition that represents over 180 million Indian workers striked…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 10, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Election, Science, Sports

Record USA Flooding Tied To White Male Tears

That's right, white boy. Go cry in the rain so no one can tell you're being a little bitch.

While September may officially be National Preparedness Month for floods in the USA, the National Weather Advisory has issued a warning that our flood problems may only worsen by the time we get to November. Apparently the rampant feelings of…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 9, 2016
  • Civil Rights, Election

Latest Polls Show That Pandering Will Lose This Election For Everyone

The way to a voter's heart is by taking a picture of you eating something that is stereotypically tied to your racial demographic.

First it was Hillary Clinton saying that she carries hot sauce with her everywhere she goes. Then it was Donald Trump and the taco bowl heard around the world. Next we had Mike Pence with his mother, eating fried chicken on an…

  • Rene Rosa
  • September 8, 2016
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