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March 28, 2023
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Monthly Archives: September 2016

Putin Resurrects KGB To Bring Home Yakov Smirnoff

The Russian Honor Guard guards the honor of Russians so no one else can have any.
We thought we heard the last of Russia’s most feared and dangerous asset, but we were...
World News

Libertarians Are Forgetting Who Gary Johnson Is

Just like most Libertarians, the porcupine they chose as their logo is prickly and generally prefers to stay alone.
As it holds true for their leadership, it is not surprising to find out that Libertarians,...
Election, Scandals

Donald Trump To Be Most Expensive Jobber In WWE History

This election has us all in a submission move.
While Donald Trump has neglected to release his tax returns, our investigative unit has been leaving...
Election, Scandals, Sports

The First 2016 Presidential Debate Was Terrifying

I don't think we even need to describe this photo.
If there is anything that has become more clear with the first presidential debate of 2016,...
Election, World News

Celebrities Comment On First Debate But We Ignore It

Washington DC - Where dreams of crushing other people's dreams come true.
As both Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump rear up to take charge and move head on...
Election

Prisoners Are On Strike, But You Don’t Care Because They’re Prisoners

And the flag was still there, because it had no possibility of parole.
In a surprising effort that shows that somehow prisoners have better communication with each other in...
Civil Rights, Scandals

Clinton Vs. Trump Compared To Crab Vs. Shoe & Other Dumb Battles

This is just one of many battles we would rather watch than the upcoming debate.
There have been many classic debates and battles over the course of human history. The first...
Election

Facebook Attempts To Increase Self-Esteem During The Most Hated USA Election

It's not just for trying to find random people to have sex with anymore! Now it's for recruiting voters!
As the 2016 Presidential Election nears, emotions are on a proverbial roller coaster, tempers are flaring...
Election, Science

Minorities And Poor Excited To Vote For People That Don’t Represent Them

Keep playing that flute, marching on into certain doom.
Is it possible to back the wrong horse? Are individuals not allowed to choose who they...
Civil Rights, Election

Stephen Hawking To Trump: “I’m Going To Kick Your F*cking Ass!”

By Jim Campbell/Aero-News Network
Stephen Hawking is one of our last living geniuses. As far as science is concerned, we...
Election, Science, World News
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Latest Posts
  • Stimulus Checks Halted To Print Tiny Trump Penis
  • You Can Call Trump A Boil-Infested, Shit-Eating Satan Baby And He Just Has To Take It
  • Fish-Human Hybrids Still Don't Exist
  • Priest Blames Pride Parade Photos For Facebook Downtime
  • What Happens If We Lose Net Neutrality?
  • Supreme Court Status Lowered To Inferior Court
  • Trump's Secret Soviet Past Tied To Gorky Park
  • Rotting Bag Of Cottage Cheese Thrown Out Of White House Two Weeks Ago But It Still Stinks
  • Trump and Kim Jong-un To Battle To The Death In Micro-Penis Sword-fight
  • Sean Spicer Resigns Thanks To Trump Hiring Gollum As Communications Director
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