Category World News


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Donald Trump Won’t Go To The White House Correspondents’ Dinner Because He’s A Punk-Ass Bitch

No hope in this great, white dope.

One might remember that now-President Donald Trump was once verbally sterilized by Seth Meyers and President Barack Obama back in 2011 at the White House Correspondent’s Dinner. The thin-skinned, lily-livered, can-dish-it-but-can’t-take-it President is very yellow about his mustard. Famously known…


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First Contact From TRAPPIST-1 Aliens Beg Us To Stay Away

The first new life in space is smarter than we are.

NASA announced yesterday that they have discovered a new solar system that has 7 planets, of which at least 3 are more than likely capable of sustaining some form of life. As scientists, fans of science and skeptics all weighed…


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Hedorah The Smog Monster Confirmed To Head EPA

Hedorah The Smog Monster

The Senate confirmed Hedorah, The Smog Monster on Friday to run the Environmental Protection Agency, putting a seasoned opponent of nature, cleanliness and renewable resources at the helm of President Trump’s efforts to dismantle major regulations on climate change, decency, clean…


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DAPL Police To Celebrate Thanksgiving By Slaughtering Native Americans And Stealing Their Land

Boy that turkey sure smells great, even though all we can smell right now is the coppery air of freshly spilled Native American blood

Get out your knives and forks, because it’s time to carve in! As tables are set around the United States for a peaceful, tranquil and dinner, Native Americans and DAPL protestors will be served a slice of pain, anguish, disgrace…


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Only Six Newspapers Endorsed Trump But His Supporters Didn’t Notice Because They Don’t Read

If you're a Trump supporter, I can say anything about you that I want, because you aren't reading this.

A shocking revelation has come about during this election cycle, as only six of the nation’s newspapers have endorsed Donald Trump, or at least are willing to admit it. While even the most hardcore Republicans have stepped away from backing…


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Americans Would Rather Vote For Negan

The potential first lady, Lucille, doing her thing on a Trump supporter zombie.

Well, no one saw that coming. After a very tense night of wondering who was next, American’s decided that they like Negan more than their current choices for president, especially Donald Trump. “I like that he speaks his mind. I…